MARISSA BURR
Opinion Editor
Since its declaration of a holiday dedicated to love in the 1300s, Valentine’s Day has been the best advertisement for hearts, flowers, candy and cards there ever was.
This holiday brings to light all sorts of traditions for couples and singles alike, and allows for celebrations with everyone.
For those in a relationship, Feb. 14 and its obligations can bring out either their best or worst qualities. Happy couples exchanging love letters can rejoice while disappointed couples choking down stale candy will suffer. There’s room for everything in between on this holiday, so it’s only right that there’s a playlist for those on both sides of the spectrum.
Sickly Sweet and Sappy
These are the love songs written for those blissfully in love and spending their Valentine’s Day at a romantic restaurant with champagne, gourmet chocolate, and a dozen fresh red roses. Being around these couples while not in that “honeymoon phase” can be nauseating, but it is nice to see other people so happy.
“Kiss” by Valentina Cy
This song is simple, cute, and could definitely show up in a teen romance movie where the main protagonist is dancing around her room in pajamas, head over heels in love. This is that “puppy love” that emerges at the beginning of the relationship as you start having your first kisses, hand holds, hugs and sexual experiences. Cy sings “now I can’t sleep cause he exists” and nails the feeling of always wanting to be around someone. The chorus is “I can’t stop thinking about that kiss” but we all know that when you’re in love like this, you can’t stop thinking about everything they do.
“I’m Yours” by Jason Mraz
I know, quite the throwback-love-song. For our generation, this song was the soundtrack of our first relationships, back in a time where we didn’t even know what love was: It’s timeless, nonetheless. The reggae-pop genre makes this a nice, calm bop you and your lover can sing together while baking cookies or riding bikes together. It’s effortlessly raw and honest with its lighthearted lyrics like “I’ve been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror.” The vocals compliment them with the casual scatting and elongated ending consonants. Layered vocals at the end add the effect that all the extras in your love story are gathered around to admire your relationship. This song is what couples listen to in their first year of dating when that honeymoon phase has faded but they’re still in sweet bliss.
“Bored Together” by Jeremy Shada
If you’ve been following this series for awhile, you’ll notice that Shada’s “Vintage” album appears a lot, and that’s because of its versatility. There were a few songs I could’ve picked for this playlist, but this one checked all of the boxes. It’s got adorable lines like “doing nothing with you is what I love doing” and “day to day is where life is lived and where the real love is.” This is the song for those old married couples–or the homebody twenty-somethings who act like them–to relate to. Hookups, situationships and casual flings are easy to spend time with as long as you’re doing something exciting, but it’s that long, loving relationship where you feel totally comfortable staying in, ordering takeout, and going to bed at 9:00 p.m. If you can’t wear your matching “Friends” sweaters with them, they aren’t the right one.
“Ours (Taylor’s Version)” by Taylor Swift
When looking at this song among the others on the album, it is clearly one of the lesser pieces because it lacks the emotional depth that makes “Speak Now” such a rollercoaster album. However, it is the perfect edition to our sickly sweet and sappy playlist–the bridge especially. Little lines like “I love the gap between your teeth” and “your hands are tough but they’re where I belong” can warm every heart. We all have those imperfections that we adore in our significant others. Not to mention the fact that the chorus is beyond catchy. I mean “don’t you worry your pretty little mind, people throw rocks at things that shine, and life makes love look hard” is lyrical genius. My best friend hadn’t heard this song before the release of Taylor’s Version this past summer, and when she did she said it sounded like something from a Disney Channel movie, and she’s not wrong. But don’t we all want that cheesy love like Troy and Gabriella?
“Wanted” by Hunter Hayes
Another older song from our early-love days, but it earned itself a spot on this list. First of all, it’s a country song and I am not much of a country fan except a few select songs, or anything by Carrie Underwood. So for this to be a song that I still listen to and remember all of the lyrics, it must be pretty special. It’s a much slower tempo than most of this playlist, making it that ballad we all dream that someone will serenade us with. I love “as good as you make me feel, I wanna make you feel better, better than your fairy tales, better than your best dreams, you’re more than everything I need.” This song comes from a place of such pure love that even the biggest Valentine’s Day hatters have to tip their hats to the couples it describes.
“Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars
Now I can’t hear this song without thinking of this 2000s black and white disney “Re-Micks” they had where Mickey Mouse was wooing Minnie Mouse (if you know what I’m talking about you’re a real OG.) The song sends the beautiful message that when you’re in love, every flaw or insecurity you might have fades away in the eyes of your partner. Every lyric written is a declaration of love. If they were spoken, they’d seem excessive: Written in a greeting card it would be poetic, but a little mushy. Bruno Mars sets it to beautiful instrumentals and adds background vocals to create the perfect masterpiece.
Too Toxic to Be Healthy
Trigger Warnings: abuse, relationship violence
With every beautiful love story like Cinderella and Prince Charming’s, there are others that aren’t so perfect. They’re the missed dinner reservations, chalky candy hearts, and withered flowers. On Valentine’s Day, the lack-luster members of the relationship may perform “grand gestures” to show they care but end up completely missing the mark: Including giving your girlfriend candy she’s deathly allergic to. Toxic relationships aren’t all the same, and the suffering can look like so many different things. To be clear, these aren’t break up songs, but rather the precursors to the break ups–warning signs. So if these songs speak to you following Feb. 14, maybe consider the single life.
“The Way I Loved You” by Taylor Swift
This is the perfect transition song into the category. It starts off talking about being with the perfect guy and how that makes life so easy, but then moves onto missing the harder parts of a previous relationship. She sings “screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain and it’s 2:00 a.m and I’m cursing your name” to show how for her it was better to be in that passionate of a relationship than an easy one. But these relationships that bring out the worst in you aren’t necessarily the best ones to be in. There’s the whole concept of “make-up sex” and how it’s full of strong emotions and that’s why it’s good. Just because it’s passionate and intense doesn’t mean it’s healthy. Easy can be boring but difficult isn’t better, so find a happy medium where there’s lust and passion but also trust and security.
“Complicated” by Avril Lavigne
Sticking to the upbeat, pop-rock theme, Lavigne’s song can be taken from both the perspective of a friend and a lover. The whole theme of this song is how complicated things get when your partner is two-faced and acts completely differently around you than everyone else. Yes, the person you love should be who you are with at your most honest and true but there shouldn’t be a total 180 shift in public. In unhealthy relationships, this can be kindness behind closed doors and abuse in public, or the reverse. Either way, you should find the person who “likes you the way you are” rather than someone who “acts like they’re something else.”
“According to You” by Orianthi
This song’s lyrics are the back and forth between an abuser and then someone outside of the relationship. The abusive partner continuously berates them saying that she’s “stupid, useless, and that she can’t do anything right.” These are words that so many people hear, when they shouldn’t because that is not love. The passion and love that you deserve comes from that outside perspective we hear. They combat the abuse by complimenting how beautiful, incredible, and funny she is. Valentine’s Day cards say these sweet phrases and heartfelt messages because that is the right way to express love. Orianthi’s use of a more acapella sound during those negative parts of the song can be interpreted as the lack of joy and excitement that are in a relationship that’s so awful. The guitar and drums kick in during the positive parts because it drowns out all of that ugly noise, and allows music and love to help mend things.
“Face Down” by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
This song reveals the darkest parts of the worst relationships, something that is rarely even discussed in songs: domestic violence. The singer is an outside perspective, watching these things go on between a man and a woman and this song is his confrontation with the abuser. He’s playing on their emotions when he says “do you feel better now, as she falls to the ground.” It’s a hypothetical question of course, because it will never satisfy anyone for long. The singer is letting him know that one day this girl is going to realize that she’s worth something and leave him, so he should be prepared for that day when everything comes crashing down. It’s a punk-rock, intense and high tempo piece that can be very therapeutic for someone who has suffered in this type of relationship before or has had someone they love be in one.
“Million Reasons” by Lady Gaga
Lady Gaga’s epic ballad is completely different tone-wise from other songs in this category, but it just makes it that much more powerful. Her strong vocals and deep piano accompaniment draw the listener in and keep them on the verge of tears. She is describing being in a relationship that is so horrible that she has a million reasons to leave and she believes that she should “run for the hills” because of how horrible it is. This relationship is filled with false promises of a better tomorrow that she can’t let herself believe because it’s all been said so many times before. Anyone outside the relationship wouldn’t know why she would stay, but she says that she “only needs one good one to stay” because despite everything she still loves them. If you are struggling with these glaringly obvious reasons to leave but can’t find the will to do it, this is a song you can relate to.
If you or a loved one are in a dangerous situation, please contact University Police or the National Domestic Violence Helpline at 800-799-7233
For a full list of the songs that inspired the series “A Playlist for Every Mood” follow @gummymnb’s playlist of the same name on Spotify!