Brandon Safe
Copy Editor
There are unfortunate, societal expectations for every race, every gender, every nationality and for any artificial grouping of people into categories. Of course, there are societal expectations for men, and for many people this is an issue. For me the primary issue is meat. Meat and masculinity.
For some strange reason, there’s a false perception that there’s an inherent connection between masculinity and the consumption of meat. This isn’t something people say directly, but there’s no denying it. Men constantly need their masculinity reassured by people around them, and one way they reassure their masculinity is by eating meat. Of course, most people eat meat and are born into believing it’s natural, but I’ve seen more women who discontinued the consumption of meat than men.
When older family members or friends find out that I stopped eating meat three years ago, they always have the same response. First, they ask “why.” Second, they ask how my friends treat me for not eating meat since I’m a guy, yet my girlfriend is never asked the same question about her friends.
When I go out to eat and I order a salad, they always forget I ordered it and give it to my girlfriend instead. When I order entrees without meat, the waitress/waiter always asks “no meat?” in a confused, judging way. They never ask my girlfriend this question in the same way. I get nervous asking servers if I can order a dish without meat because I know I’m going to be judged.
Some older people feel uncomfortable when a man orders a meal without meat. It’s scandalous, I know.
Telling people you’re a vegetarian isn’t an easy thing to do, either. People always judge you.
I’m a manager at an auto parts store where masculinity is most fragile amongst customers and workers alike, and I have to hide my diet as best as I can. This is because anytime I’m forced to tell people, they verbally question my masculinity, jokingly or not. I don’t tell a lot of family friends who I know will think less of me for being a man who doesn’t eat meat.
Vegans are highly judged, too. People make fun of them. People make jokes that aren’t funny, and there’s a false perception that vegetarians and vegans push their values onto other people. In my experience, vegetarians and vegans are often quiet about their diet until ignorance causes them to speak out, and those who aren’t quiet about their diets are just proud of the people that they are — and they should be.
I rarely speak out about my diet to people I don’t know (this article being an exception), and I respect other people’s dietary choices as well.
What people don’t realize is that it may seem like vegetarians express their beliefs more often, but that’s only because you’re more likely to notice a diet that doesn’t align with the majority’s diets or your own diet. Every time somebody says they want chicken nuggets (which is far too often), every time somebody shares recipes with meat, every time you go out to eat, you’re sharing your beliefs. Vegetarians are sometimes forced to explain their diet in situations where they’re forced to eat in front of other people.
Saturated fats in meat don’t lead to an increase in testosterone; healthy fats do, which primarily exist in vegetables. There’s no purposeful belief that meat and masculinity should be thought of as interconnected.
I don’t eat meat because of health reasons and because of animal rights, and I’ll continue finding ways to feel comfortable as a man who doesn’t consume meat. Just as anybody should feel comfortable with their own diets. Just as anybody should feel with their own personal characteristics that may or may not align with societal expectations.