WILL KARR
Editor in Chief
I remember standing up in front of my class in middle school giving a presentation and suddenly, I was speechless. Everyone around me thought that I had just forgotten the words. But I knew them — the truth is I just couldn’t say them. It wasn’t even that I couldn’t pronounce them. I physically couldn’t say the words.
As I approached junior high, I started realizing that I wasn’t like all the other kids. When I would go to say certain words, my jaw would immediately lock, and my mouth wouldn’t form the right words, sentences and phrases I had intended to. I didn’t have any control over my own speech. I didn’t quite understand or fully grasp why at the time. I just remember crying about it.
I slowly came to terms with the fact that I had a speech impediment – a stutter. For the longest time, I didn’t want anyone around me to know or find out, so I just stopped talking. I started avoiding and replacing words, sentences and phrases for fear that someone would discover my secret. I didn’t want to appear stupid or unintelligent. Growing up, everyone always assumed I was the shy kid, when in reality, I was really just speechless.
However, in my junior/senior year of high school, I decided to enroll in my former English teacher Barbi Price’s college-level public speaking course. For the class, we regularly wrote five minute speeches, memorized them and recited them to the class. I found that when I would write something down and memorize it, I wouldn’t stutter anymore — I suddenly found my voice. Writing my words down on paper gave me a voice when I felt speechless.
During my senior year, I ended up entering the Optimist Oratorical Speech contest. The theme of the speech for that year was “Is there a fine line between optimism and reality?” My best friend Emily Crasti encouraged me to do it with her. At a time when I was nervous about simply speaking in front of my peers for fear of judgment, the thought of giving a speech in front of panels of judges, whose literal job is to actually judge and critique you, was terrifying to me. Regardless of my apprehensions, I decided to go for it.
I spent hours in my cramped bedroom privately perfecting that five minute speech in front of the mirror. But, speeches are ultimately meant to be heard. My words soon traveled outside of the sanctity of my Buzz Lightyear, green bedroom walls into spacious conference rooms and auditoriums.
For the first round of the contest, the Club Level, I presented the speech at my local YMCA. I ended up placing second. My friend Grayson Holt, who placed first, and I moved onto the next level of competition, the Zone Level, in Lockport, N.Y. Grayson’s twin Finley and I were in the public speaking class together. Grayson and I ended up eventually advancing to New York State finals, where I placed third overall in the competition.
For one of the first times in my life, I felt heard, seen and understood. I had found the courage and strength to speak up regardless of my fears. I remember how happy I was when one of the judges placed the copper medal around my neck. The speech competition taught me that I had the power within me to accomplish anything that I set my mind to — if there is a will, there’s a way. All I had to do was ‘Will’ it into existence.
I graduated from Jamestown High School in 2019, a year earlier than I was supposed to. Since I graduated a year early, I was able to still have a prom and an in-person graduation ceremony — a luxury and privilege that many of my beloved friends who graduated in 2020 unfortunately didn’t get to experience.
After I graduated from JHS, I attended Jamestown Community College (JCC) in my hometown from Summer 2019 to Spring 2021. When I first went to JCC, I majored in social sciences. However, during my final semester, a few months before the pandemic, I soon discovered that communications was a major.
As a result of my public speaking background, I quickly switched my major to communications and graduated with my associate’s degree in communications from JCC in Spring 2021.
I transferred to Fredonia from JCC in Fall 2021. I was considering majoring in speech pathology, but I decided to ultimately major in journalism here at Fredonia after starting to watch reporter Gio Benitez on ABC News. I started watching Benitez after his husband Tommy Didario, a TV host, popped up on my Instagram discovery page during the pandemic.
As a transfer and commuter student, I didn’t have the typical college experience coming in two years later than most of my peers who started at Fredonia as freshman on campus. Also, coming in during the pandemic, we were all wearing masks so I couldn’t see anyones facial expressions, which complicated things even further and made it difficult for me to make friends at first.
I spent my first semester mostly acclimating and adjusting myself to campus. I remember I was so nervous walking into journalism professor Mike Igoe’s Foundations in Journalism class for the first time in the basement of the Science Center. But, I felt comfortable once I saw his burnt orange pants and got to know his perky personality.
In Spring 2022, The Leader’s adviser Elmer Ploetz and Chloe Kowalyk, News Editor at the time, approached me after a class asking me if I wanted to start writing for The Leader. I said that I would consider it, but never started writing that semester because I was extremely stubborn and preferred to keep mostly to myself.
However, last summer, I did an internship at The Chautauquan Daily newspaper at Chautauqua Institution with Alyssa Bump, the Editor in Chief of The Leader at the time. The internship gave me a newfound sense of confidence. Throughout the summer, Alyssa encouraged me to join The Leader. Upon returning to campus this past fall, I became the Life & Arts Editor and started writing regularly for The Leader.
This spring, I served as Editor in Chief. Even though I may have had the shortest Editor in Chief run as the position is traditionally a year long term, I have been able to accomplish more than I could have ever imagined in a semester.
From helping recruit many new staff members, to significantly increasing The Leader’s advertising revenue and social media engagement rates, I have made it my mission and goal to help revitalize The Leader for not only now, but for future generations and cohorts to come.
From restructuring our entire sports section to better highlight Fredonia’s diverse array of athletic programs, to later raising awareness to and calling out the campus Athletics Department’s unfair treatment of club athletes, I have learned to expect the unexpected and the importance of stepping outside of one’s comfort zone to speak up
Overall, being Editor in Chief has encouraged me to use my voice and The Leader’s unique platform to be an advocate for change and institutional reform at times when it would have been very easy and more convenient for me to remain silent: speechless. I have worked to hold campus officials and administrators accountable on multiple occasions, while striving to simultaneously highlight the positive aspects of our campus life for students. As a queer person of color, I have loved amplifying some of our campus’ diverse voices — helping to ensure that no one is speechless.
From quitting my retail job this past fall to putting The Leader before my personal relationships/friendships on many occasions, I have made a lot of sacrifices for The Leader that I am honestly still coming to terms with, processing and reconciling.
This academic year has been a whirlwind for me, but I am thankful that it has all brought me to where I am now. To quote The Leader’s queen Taylor Swift’s poem “Why She Disappeared”: “Without your past, you could never have arrived — so wonderfully and brutally, By design or some violent, exquisite happenstance … here.”
My journey to this point has been both extremely fulfilling and painful. It’s so full circle and surreal for me to think that I graduated high school four years ago and now I am about to graduate from college. In my optimism speech during my senior year, I talked about the difference between optimism and reality.
I said, “Optimism softens us, instills in us the qualities of positivity and hopefulness and encourages us to attain our aspirations despite imminent failure. On the contrary, reality hardens, keeps us narrow minded and forces us to abide by a set of limitations determined by history, life experience and the failures of others.”
I could have let the reality of having a speech impediment continue to stand in the way of me ever finding my voice. However, I decided to take an optimistic leap of faith. I am so happy that I did because I would not be at The Leader, studying journalism or where I am today if it was not for that single five minute optimist speech. Those five minutes paved my trajectory.
I am truly so grateful for all the friendships and memories that I have made throughout my time at The Leader. I would like to specifically thank Leader Adviser Elmer Ploetz, Chief Copy & Design Editor Alyssa Bump, Sports Editor Max Hamilton and Community Relations Coordinator Capri Cibelli for their unwavering support and encouragement throughout this spring semester. I am eternally grateful for Alyssa, Max and Capri’s friendship and can’t wait to make more memories in the future.
I am excited to announce that after graduation, this June, I will be participating in the Buffalo News 10-week long summer internship program. I am so excited to start my journalism career right here in WNY and spend this upcoming summer in Buffalo.
I know that I would not have been given this opportunity if it were not for my time at SUNY Fredonia and The Leader. Even though my goal down the road is to eventually become a communication director or coordinator for a public official, I am excited to pursue journalism for a little while longer.
I am thankful for my time at Fredonia, and I look forward to seeing whatever the future holds for me.
My mason jar is full of memories from Fredonia that I will always carry with me into the future no matter where I may end up.
Wishing you peace, love and positivity.
Sincerely,
Your not so speechless anymore Spring 2023 Editor in Chief, Will Karr