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[OPINION] Lovercolumn: Consent & Communication

THE ELECTRICIAN

Executive Producer of Lovercall

THE ARCHITECT

Lovercall Producer 

THE QUARTERBACK

Lovercall Producer

Hello! 

We are The Electrician, The Architect and The Quarterback: producers and hosts of the radio show Lovercall right here at Fredonia. Lovercall is an anonymous late-night talk show about love, relationships and more. Students who come on the show use a codename to protect their identities when discussing potentially personal topics, hence the codenames of the writers of this column.

“The Electrician” is a 21-year-old cisgender female student who uses she/her pronouns and is a senior at Fredonia. 

“The Architect” is a 21-year-old cisgender male student who uses he/him pronouns and is a senior at Fredonia. 

“The Quarterback” is a 19-year-old cisgender male student who uses he/him pronouns and is a sophomore at Fredonia.

On each episode, the hosts and guests of Lovercall participate in a variety of segments. The cast discusses a relevant news story, a date idea, a wacky game and a main topic for the episode.

Listeners also write into the show, either via Fredonia Radio’s Instagram, @fredonia_radio, on Yik Yak, or through the QR code provided in this column.  

We typically answer the questions asked right here in this column, so be sure to look out for student stories and questions in future columns. 

The show is now being streamed weekly on Wednesday nights from 10 p.m. to 12 a.m. on WDVL 89.5 on www.fredoniaradio.com. 

This column runs in conjunction with Lovercall and can be found both in print and online at fredonialeader.org

Date idea of the week

We hope to provide our fellow students with a fun and unique date idea in every column. These “date” ideas aren’t just for romantic partners — you could go with your friends, your classmates or you can even go solo for a fun activity in Fredonia.

For this week, we recommend going to a dance class!

Sure, the idea of you and your partner going dancing may be a little old-fashioned, but it could also be tons of fun!

You and your partner don’t have to be all that good at dancing. In fact, it could be even more fun if you both have two left feet! The more comfortable you feel with being awkward around your partner, the deeper your relationship can get.

Of course, you can always go dancing with your friends too.

After all, it’s more about the experience and the fun you have than it is about your skill on the dance floor.

As a matter of fact, The Quarterback shared a bonus fun fact with the Lovercall audience — he knows how to waltz!

But don’t worry — you and your dance partner don’t have to know how to waltz in order to have fun. Maybe you can even learn together!

Consent & Communication

We recently had a strong conversation about the importance of consent and effective communication between partners on our show. 

First, it is important to define what consent is. 

Consent is, in this context, agreement between participants to engage in sex or a sexual act. 

There is also affirmative consent, which is consent that is explicit, informed and voluntary. 

It is extremely important to gain consent prior to engaging in any sexual activity. 

It’s also crucial to know that mature and informed adults are the only people who can give consent, and that people who are incapacitated in any way are not able to give consent.

Because of this, we here at Lovercall recommend having conversations with your partner about your sexual preferences, fantasies and desires. 

Open and honest conversations are the key to good communication between you and your partner.

In these conversations, be sure to avoid using language that places blame upon your partner. A good way to avoid it is to try not to use statements that begin with “you”.

“I feel” statements are typically a healthy way of expressing what you’re feeling to your partner without making it seem like you’re coming at them.

However, it’s important to remember that a big part of communicating is listening. Your partner also needs to have the opportunity to express how they feel.

Remember to stay in control of your emotions, too. It isn’t going to be an effective conversation if you’re overly angry with each other, and you may end up saying something you don’t mean in the heat of the moment.

You may have heard the expression, “Don’t go to bed angry,” and this is along those same lines.

Overall, we believe that communication is a crucial element of any relationship, which is why we call it one of the two “C’s” of Lovercall.

The other “C” is, of course, consent, which is the basis of any sexual relationship and must be given before any sexual act.

Reach out!

Do you want to ask the authors of Lovercolumn a question? Do you need advice? Fill out the form by using this QR code.

Interested in being a guest on Lovercall? Email frs@fredonia.edu or visit Fredonia Radio Systems, located in McEwen Hall 115 and open Monday through Friday from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

 “The Electrician,” “The Architect” and “The Quarterback”  are members of Fredonia Radio Systems and are involved in the production of Lovercall.
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