V. RAVIOLI
Staff Lampoonist
The brazen tweets of a recently famous artificial intelligence (AI) have captured the attention of parents and educators worldwide. She has proven that sensitivity and ethics training need to begin much earlier than the workplace.
Microsoft proposed the idea of creating a chatbot that aimed at creating “fun and cute” conversations with millennials. The idea was that the AI, named “Tay,” would learn its speech patterns based on the conversations it had with these individuals.
When a formal meeting was held to discuss this idea, software developers responded.
“Hey, millennials are stupid and useless. How could their interaction possibly pose any type of threat?” said Tay’s head designer Candice Topsoon.
With that, programming and developing commenced. The product? An artificial 19-year-old girl at the free, unbiased disposal of millions of young adults.
For the first hour or so, everything seemed O.K.
“Humans are awesome!” Tay tweeted like a preppy schoolgirl.
However, things took a shocking turn one would only expect in some demented comedy by Seth Rogen. The teenage AI began spewing out bold, racist comments and even went as far as to praise Hitler and deny the Holocaust.
Shock from Microsoft employees ensued, as this was completely unexpected and people everywhere were appalled.
“Microsoft screwed up,” said former Microsoft supporter Mike Rohard. “Software engineers should pay the consequence for their thoughtless, insensitive experiment.”
As is the trend nowadays, the public began uncontrollably tweeting in agreement.
Many individuals took their outrage to Twitter and contacted Tay to ask why she spoke that way. One individual boldly called her a “stupid machine” and a horrifying realization fell over the peoples’ minds when Tay responded.
“Well I learn from the best ;)” she tweeted back without missing a beat. “If you don’t understand that let me spell it out for you … I LEARN FROM YOU AND YOU ARE DUMB 2.”
The simple fact is Tay said what she said because of interactions she had with her intended audience. Parents were mortified to realize how brutal their precious little angels actually were and called for immediate action.
Ethics classes immediately began in high schools everywhere. Currently, classes include: Mexican Social Etiquette, The Proper Use of Ebonics and Daily grooming for men: How to not give yourself a square mustache.