TRAVIS LEFEVRE
Editor in Chief
Moving in for your first semester can be an intimidating experience, but for incoming freshman Wolfgang Claude, it’s euphoric.
For his entire life, Claude has been forced by his parents to listen to the classics. Not like, Black Eyed Peas classic, but rather Beethoven and Vivaldi. All of that will be changing, as Claude will be moving in with Lil Litski, a self-made rapper on SoundCloud.
“I put down that I was very interested in music on that roommate match thing that they do, and next thing you know, I’m with Little Litski!” Claude said. “I gotta say, I’m really excited for this opportunity to be living with someone who is so highly respected and has so much street cred!”
Lil Litski currently has 100 followers on SoundCloud with 20 tracks released so far. He currently holds one award for “Wackest Track of 2018” from some random rap blog we found on Blogspot. In terms of overall popularity, he ranks #1,309,294 out of #1,310,304 on SoundCloud’s “most popular artists” section of their website.
“I feel like I’ve been living under a rock for all of these years, so the idea that I get to move away and diversify my music taste is so exciting. It’s going to be, dare I say, lit?” he cackled.
To prepare himself for his new living quarters, Claude has been listening to Lil Litski’s music behind closed doors and well away from his parents. According to him, he uses the new music as a means of escaping reality and the only thing that could blow his cover is his own excitement.
“One day my mom barged into my room while I was listening. I had headphones in so she couldn’t hear me, but I almost yelled at her to ‘get the fuck up out my trap house.’ So yeah, that was a close call I think,” Claude said. “I just can’t contain my excitement anymore. I need to meet this man. He’s revolutionary!”
Roommate matching has been used by the SUNY Fredonia campus for years to let people meet their perfect match and is seen to be a success 99.99% of the time, and this instance is no exception.
The Scallion reached out to Lil Litski for a comment, to which he replied, “Who?”