The Leader
Scallion

What’s that, Fredonia? What do YOU think of our incumbent president, Dr. Hefner?

JOSEPH MARCINIAK

Scallion Editor

Wanda Plongo, sophomore political science major

“Who?”

Goulash Jambalaya, senior criminal justice major

“I think it’s pretty interesting that the rotting corpse of Hugh Hefner is now the president of Fredonia. What a small world we live in.”

Greej Dunkle, freshman anti-mathematics major

“If I knew anything about campus politics, I’d say something really smart. But honestly, I don’t really care. I have opinions about Willy C’s. Can you ask me a question about that?”

John Marcuston, freshman skeptics major

“Well, I just looked him up on the Fredonia website, and I can’t lie, he has an impressive resume. But we need to remember that resumes never tell the full story. I mean look at his face. He looks like one crooked bastard.”

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