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Fredonia NY
March 24, 2025
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Nine minors to be removed from Fredonia curriculum

Ice, ice, maybe? The problem with Fredonia’s lack of salt…

[POEM] Inheritance of Fate

[POEM] Ghosts

[POEM] Static Bathe Waves

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Which pop culture moment are you?

Lucas West takes center field with national anthem performance on…

New rule halts music lessons on campus

Police Blotter (Issue 3 | Spring 2025)

[SATIRE] Local Scallion Editor runs out of ideas

The Leader

Horoscopes

Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Which pop culture moment are you?

Abbie Miller
ABIGAIL MILLER Editor-in-Chief, Boasting a 5-hour-a-day Average Screen Time With the Oscars right around the corner and the Grammys, Critics Choice Awards and BAFTAs taking place last month, there is seldom a time period as rich in notable celebrity moments as now.  Many say that the rise of the Internet......
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Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: How did you spend your Valentine’s Day?

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, Hopeful Romantic  In my opinion, Valentine’s Day is the one holiday that is as universally hated as it is loved.  Those who do not have a romantic partner are left hating those who do and those who do are left too blissfully unaware of their surroundings to......
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Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Which New Year’s resolution is right for you?

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, Reluctant Gemini As we head into the second month of the new year, the resolutions that we were so sure we would stick to start to fade from memory.  The ball drop appears to have had the same effect as the neuralyzer in the “Men in Black”......
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Scallion

Abbie’s Thanksgiving food tier list

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, Thanksgiving Food Connoisseur S-Tier Items Mac and cheese: Look at that picture and tell me your mouth didn’t just start watering. That’s right — you can’t. This may be a hot take, but I firmly believe that mac and cheese belongs on everyone’s Thanksgiving Day platter. It......
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Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes and it’s the same but I’m an alum so it’s different 

Contributor to The Leader
JACE JACOBS Former Assistant Editor of The Scallion, “Adult” with a “Job” who “Has To Go To Work”  What’s up Fredonians? I bet you thought you had seen the last of me, with my incredibly well-crafted, tear-stained Letter from the Desk Of and my gorgeous final horoscopes.  WELL GUESS WHAT! ......
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Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: What should your sign dress up as for Halloween?

Abbie Miller
ABIGAIL MILLER Editor-in-Chief As the leaves change and my body begins to resist doing anything that resembles schoolwork, I know one thing: it is time. Dust off those black glittery stilettos that you only wear once a year. Dig out the costume you’ve been reusing since freshman year from the......
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Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Which Starbucks fall menu item are you?

Drew Paluch
ABIGAIL MILLER Editor-in-Chief, Two-Star Comedian Yes, I added another star because The Leader staff told me I was being too hard on myself. Also, I made Scallion Editor Megan Kidby laugh so I’m still riding that wave.  In other exciting news, Starbucks has officially released their fall menu. And who......
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