Horoscopes

Contributor to The LeaderOctober 20, 2015August 18, 2019

October 20, 2015August 18, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutes AMANDA DEDIE News Editor Capricorn If you’ve had a strong craving for nuts lately, you’re either turning into a squirrel or you’re just really horny. Get down to the C-store or Sunny’s, ASAP, and just — dare I say it? — go nuts! Aquarius It’s getting colder,......

Scallion

Horoscopes

Contributor to The LeaderOctober 13, 2015August 15, 2019

October 13, 2015August 15, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutesTHE FEVER Lampoonist Capricorn Capricorn? More like Capri-CORNY. You will be subjected to heavy doses of cheesy humor if you continue your regular routine. Switch it up to avoid persistent psyche-damaging humor. Aquarius Be wary of your surroundings, Aquarius. You will encounter many heartbroken friends and companions this......

Scallion

Horoscopes Week 6

Contributor to The LeaderOctober 1, 2015August 15, 2019

October 1, 2015August 15, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutesPHYLLIS T. CUPP Lampoonist Capricorn It’s getting cold enough to retire your favorite pair of short shorts this week, Capricorn. The frilled hem wasn’t doing you any favors anyway. Aquarius If you get stir fry from the Williams Center, make sure you also buy a lot of water.......

Scallion

This week’s horoscope

Contributor to The LeaderFebruary 25, 2015September 1, 2019

February 25, 2015September 1, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutesMEL N. KOLICH Special to the Lampoon Aries: To forgive others one more time is to create one more blessing for yourself. This is a good week to message that ex or maybe call your parents. Try and remember that free will is an illusion and the decisions they made......

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Horoscopes Week 6

This week’s horoscope