The Leader

Satire

NewsScallion

[SCALLION/NEWS] Campus bus leaves students traumatized

Contributor to The Leader
ALEX BUCKNAM  Asst. News Editor  The Fredonia campus bus has officially left four students traumatized during their nightly travels.  Since the creation of the Campus and Community Bus in 1973, there have always been stories of students being forgotten at places.  But no stories could prepare four students for what......
Police NotterScallion

[SATIRE/NEWS] Police Notters

Contributor to The Leader
UNIVERSITY POLICE DEPARTMENT SUNY Fredonia The Police Notters, run and shared with The Leader by the University Police Department (UPD), aims to provide information to students, faculty and the community at and around SUNY Fredonia. All information provided is not true and is satire. The Police Notters will not continue......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: How did you spend your Valentine’s Day?

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, Hopeful Romantic  In my opinion, Valentine’s Day is the one holiday that is as universally hated as it is loved.  Those who do not have a romantic partner are left hating those who do and those who do are left too blissfully unaware of their surroundings to......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Which New Year’s resolution is right for you?

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, Reluctant Gemini As we head into the second month of the new year, the resolutions that we were so sure we would stick to start to fade from memory.  The ball drop appears to have had the same effect as the neuralyzer in the “Men in Black”......
Scallion

Ranking Politicians’ Merch

Contributor to The Leader
GEORGIA MORTILLARO Special to The Leader As we all very well know, fashion is one of the most important aspects of the political landscape.  Just mere weeks from the Election Day itself, I’ll be rating the merchandise of the 2024 political candidates.  Robert F. Kennedy Jr.  Designs: When you look......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes and it’s the same but I’m an alum so it’s different 

Contributor to The Leader
JACE JACOBS Former Assistant Editor of The Scallion, “Adult” with a “Job” who “Has To Go To Work”  What’s up Fredonians? I bet you thought you had seen the last of me, with my incredibly well-crafted, tear-stained Letter from the Desk Of and my gorgeous final horoscopes.  WELL GUESS WHAT! ......

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