The Leader
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Life lessons from the signs

Contributor to The Leader
JACE JACOBS Assistant Editor of The Scallion, Senior! Graduating! Woohoo!  My dearest Fredheads,  I regret to inform you all that this will be the last time you’ll read my wonderful, beautiful, incredibly accurate, always hilarious horoscopes. Although I am overjoyed to be leaving America’s favorite dog food town, I am......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Highlighting the Feminist Men of Media: Andrew Tate and Elon Musk

Contributor to The Leader
MEGAN KIDBY Scallion Editor In honor of this special issue, I wanted to highlight some quotes from the most amazing men … Elon Musk and Andrew Tate.  These beautiful men have really paved the way for strong and powerful females like me.  Once, I was just a self-conscious girl and......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Moments of womanhood aligned with the signs

Contributor to The Leader
JACE JACOBSAssistant Editor of The Scallion  ABIGAIL MILLER  Managing Editor  Hello Fredonians and a very happy Woman Issue to all who celebrate (guys please don’t hate me for calling it that, it’s literally what our Editor in Chief called it)!  For some context, I am a transgender man, so although......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: Why your sign should sign up for The Bachelor

Contributor to The Leader
FACE FACOBSNew Assistant Editor of The Scallion, Jace’s Replacement Hello everyone! My name is Face Facobs and I am Jace Jacobs’ official replacement! In light of his horoscopes being too long, he has been fired, and I have replaced him. Although we’ve never met, I’ve decided to throw my predecessor......

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