The Leader

scallion

Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: What Leader executive board member are you?

Abbie Miller
ABBIE MILLER  Editor-in-Chief, All-Knowing Zodiac Specialist  In all my days as The Leader’s resident zodiac expert (it’s only been a semester and a half), I’ve collected quite the knowledge on the traits of each horoscope sign.  And as The Leader’s Editor-in-Chief, I possess perhaps too much understanding of the ins......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Horoscopes: What kind of onion is your sign?

Contributor to The Leader
JACE JACOBS Former Assistant Editor of The Scallion, Semi-Professional Onion Researcher Good morrow, my dearest Fredonians!  In the wise words of the greatest poet of our generation, guess who’s back, back, back, back again? (Spoiler alert: it’s me)  In honor of The Scallion takeover of The Leader (which I have......
NewsScallion

[SCALLION/NEWS] Campus bus leaves students traumatized

Contributor to The Leader
ALEX BUCKNAM  Asst. News Editor  The Fredonia campus bus has officially left four students traumatized during their nightly travels.  Since the creation of the Campus and Community Bus in 1973, there have always been stories of students being forgotten at places.  But no stories could prepare four students for what......
Police NotterScallion

[SATIRE/NEWS] Police Notters

Contributor to The Leader
UNIVERSITY POLICE DEPARTMENT SUNY Fredonia The Police Notters, run and shared with The Leader by the University Police Department (UPD), aims to provide information to students, faculty and the community at and around SUNY Fredonia. All information provided is not true and is satire. The Police Notters will not continue......
ScallionSports

[SCALLION/SPORTS] Volz enlisted to help suffering Sabres

Matt Volz
MATT VOLZ Sports Editor, New Sabres General Manager/Owner The Buffalo Sabres are going through it. They’re about to miss the playoffs for the 14th season in a row, extending their record-long drought. They’ve tried everything from different coaches to different general managers and players, but none of it has worked.......
Scallion

[SATIRE] “A Sitdown With Brock” season premiere gets leaked

Contributor to The Leader
BROCK PAPKE  Special to The Leader Trigger warning: This article contains strong language and depictions of cartoon violence and injury. In a turn of events that surprised absolutely no one, the final season premiere of “A Sitdown With Brock Papke” has been unceremoniously leaked onto the internet, setting off a......

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