ALEXANDRA WALSH
Special to The Leader
Aquarius:
Summer is coming up and we are all dying to know, is your summer body ready yet? Probably not, so start jogging.
Pisces:
It takes a lot to sit in the house all day, but you know what else is hard? These online classes. Get your head out of the gutter.
Aries:
April distance brings MAY EXISTENCE.
Taurus:
Fake tan won’t fix the personality you have.
Gemini:
According to research, Geminis have great smiles. I beg to differ.
Cancer:
How has quarantine been treating you?
Leo:
None for Leo. Bye.
Virgo:
Good job, Virgo. You are the most liked zodiac sign, according to my vibes.
Libra:
Thank God we are quarantined. Your hair looks awful.
Scorpio:
Everyone loves a Scorpio because everyone loves fake people. Boom, roasted.
Sagittarius:
We often look out the window and hope we see a sign that something good is happening. It could be the sun shining a certain way, or even the trees blowing in the wind. For you, Sagittarius, there is no sign.
Capricorn:
Capricorns are known to be great kissers. If that’s true, hit me up.