The Scallion - Page 40 of 84 - The Leader, SUNY Fredonia's student-run newspaper

Mar-A-Lago: Where Russian operatives are at your service: Trump’s latest oblivious nightmare (or success?)

Contributor to The LeaderApril 4, 2018September 9, 2019

April 4, 2018September 9, 2019

PATRICK BENNETT Staff Scallywag This past weekend, affluent members of the esteemed Palm Beach Mar-a-Lago were surprised to learn that their stay was magnificent, due to the hard work of Russian operatives posing as butlers. “When we booked our overnight stay at the resort we were met with beautiful......

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Advice column from a nihilist

Contributor to The LeaderApril 4, 2018

April 4, 2018

NICHOLAS NIHILIST Staff Nihilist Dear nihilist, My girlfriend is constantly controlling every aspect of my life. Like, at first it was small favors here and there, and I didn’t mind. That was five years ago and now I am hiding in a closet, pretending that I am looking for......

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Terrified lawmakers claim that everyone who showed up to the “March For Our Lives” event were crisis actors

Contributor to The LeaderApril 4, 2018

April 4, 2018

JACLYN SPIEZIA Staff Scallywag When children started speaking out after the Parkland mass shooting, including recently at the March for Our Lives, lawmakers were concerned that young children had well-formed opinions. “Just because people lost family members and friends due to gun violence doesn’t mean they have the right......

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The Scallion’s sit-down with the man responsible for the President’s tangerine tint

Contributor to The LeaderApril 4, 2018August 25, 2019

April 4, 2018August 25, 2019

DEMI CRITIC Political Novice of The Scallion It’s no secret that we at The Scallion take journalistic integrity seriously. So seriously, that we sometimes have to dig up the dirt ourselves. The tell-all of a pornstar on “60 Minutes” proved to be one hell of a Stormy situation. Inspired......

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Police Notter

Contributor to The LeaderApril 4, 2018

April 4, 2018

EMMA PATTERSON Editor of The Scallion Monday, March 26, 2018 1:25 p.m. Jimmy John, 19, was detained by University Police after complaints of him shouting multiple unpopular opinions spread across campus. He was last heard yelling, “‘Cars 2’ rocked my world, and here’s why” as UP took him away.......

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Betsy DeVos is unconvinced that children exist

Contributor to The LeaderMarch 28, 2018

March 28, 2018

JACLYN SPIEZIA Staff Scallywag Betsy DeVos is in disagreeance with the rest of society about the existence of children. The controversy started when DeVos was asked about her future plans as secretary of education. When she responded, Betsy DeVos at first seemed confused, almost as if she had forgotten......

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A letter from Regret — everyone’s favorite buzzkill

Contributor to The LeaderMarch 28, 2018

March 28, 2018

MORGAN HENDERSON and EMMA PATTERSON Staff Scallywag and Editor of the Scallion To the poor broken body I have the current misfortune of inhabiting (AKA Paul), First of all, I’ve had enough of all of you. Every day it’s the same thing. Every time spring break rolls around I......

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