[COMIC] Something in the air
Reading Time: < 1 minuteNICOLE THORSON Art Director...
[SATIRE] Horoscopes: What Glee cover are you?
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[SATIRE] Top 10 Reasons Why My Dad Should Be President
Reading Time: 2 minutesJACE JACOBS Assistant Scallion Editor Photo By TARA WINSTEAD | Provided by Pexels Election season is quickly approaching, and I thought it would benefit the public to know why I feel my father would be the best choice for president of the United States. (PS. Please don’t tell him I......
[SATIRE] KENERGY: A RETROSPECTIVE
Reading Time: 3 minutesJACE JACOBS Assistant Scallion Editor Since the release of the “Barbie” movie, a new phenomenon has been sweeping the nation: Kenergy. Unfortunately, this movement has been misconstrued and overtaken by what I call “Fens” (fake Kens). Kenergy isn’t for every man, and some men don’t get that. Kenergy is for......
[SATIRE] QUIZ: Does Your Crush Like You Back?
Reading Time: 2 minutesMEGAN KIDBY Scallion Editor Graphic by KAROLINA GRABOWSKA | Courtesy of Pexels In my humble editor’s opinion, you really shouldn’t date in college because college people are icky, but if you REALLY want to know if your crush likes you, I suggest taking this quiz! Question #1: What is your......
[SATIRE] Horoscopes: First edition Fall 2023
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[COMIC] MoMA
Reading Time: < 1 minuteNICOLE THORSON Art Director...
[SATIRE] PLEASE write for the Scallion
Reading Time: 2 minutesMEGAN KIDBY Scallion Editor Photo by Element5 Digital | Courtesy of Pexels Dear Witty Wordsmiths and Hilarious Humans, Greetings from the Headquarters of The Scallion, the renowned newspaper section that tickles funny bones and stimulates chuckles on a daily basis! We hope this letter finds you in a state of......
[COMIC] Willy C’s Milkshake
Reading Time: < 1 minuteDICE YANDOW Staff Artist...
[COMIC] Hard night’s day
Reading Time: < 1 minuteNICOLE THORSON Art Director...