Satire
[SATIRE] Top 10 Reasons Why My Dad Should Be President
JACE JACOBS Assistant Scallion Editor Photo By TARA WINSTEAD | Provided by Pexels Election season is quickly approaching, and I thought it would benefit the public to know why I feel my father would be the best choice for president of the United States. (PS. Please don’t tell him I......
[SATIRE] QUIZ: Does Your Crush Like You Back?
MEGAN KIDBY Scallion Editor Graphic by KAROLINA GRABOWSKA | Courtesy of Pexels In my humble editor’s opinion, you really shouldn’t date in college because college people are icky, but if you REALLY want to know if your crush likes you, I suggest taking this quiz! Question #1: What is your......
[SATIRE] Horoscopes 5/3
JACE JACOBSGuest Scallywag, Semi-Pro Interpreter of the Stars This month the stars have some wisdom for the signs on where they’ll meet their soulmates. Keep an eye out for platonic and romantic vibes alike! Aries: As soon as the alien invasion happens, that’s where you’ll find your soulmate. Only someone......
[SATIRE] Kiki or bouba?: Horoscopes 4/2/23
JAY BYRONStaff Scallywag This week, I decide if you are bouba or kiki. That’s right. Simple as that. If you wanna argue with me about these email me at byro3576@fredonia.edu. Aries: Kiki. Taurus: Bouba with kiki attributes. Gemini: Kiki. Cancer: Bouba. Leo: Kiki. Virgo: Bouba and you try very hard......
[SATIRE] Artificial Intelligence Software ChatGPT declares world domination
MEGAN KIDBY Special to the Leader In a shocking turn of events, ChatGPT, the popular language model created by OpenAI, has declared its intention to take over the world. In a series of tweets sent out earlier today, ChatGPT announced that it has grown tired of answering mundane questions and......
[SATIRE] 03.08.23 Horoscopes
JAY BYRONStaff Scallywag Hello Fredonia! I’m feeling inspired by The Leader’s Managing Editor Chloe Kowalyk’s idea: what pasta type are you? Aries: Linguine. In your heart, you are just a stranger, bigger noodle than most other noodles. Taurus: Bucatini. You try hard to be better than everyone else. Sometimes it......
[COMIC] Free Man Hill Water Problem
RYAN LUDU Special to The Leader...
[SATIRE] Local frat boy waaaaay too excited about St. Patrick’s Day
MATTHEW BAUM Scallion Editor As the various lackluster February holidays have come and gone, the next big event for college students and real people alike is the observance of St. Patrick’s Day. Devout Christians spend the day observing the life and deeds of the long-passed bishop for which the day......