The Scallion - Page 60 of 82 - The Leader, SUNY Fredonia's student-run newspaper

May 5, 2016

RAVIOLI Staff Lampoonist With temperatures still hovering around 50-55 degrees Fahrenheit and expected to stay that way through the semester, some would say that Fredonia’s weather is just as messed up as always. The terrifying truth, however, is that global warming is, indeed, real and is showing itself......

Scallion

Donald Trump slams The Onion, vomiting, everything else

Contributor to The LeaderMay 5, 2016September 9, 2019

May 5, 2016September 9, 2019

THE FEVER Assistant Lampoonist Donald Trump has a knack for calling out the dishonesty of the media. Out of this, he has created massive appeal, especially from millionaire and undercover Sith Lord Carl Paladino. No news outlet is safe from the Donald’s lashing out at their dishonesty. Not even......

Scallion

SEXFest reveals seedy underbelly of Fredonia social scene

Contributor to The LeaderMay 5, 2016

May 5, 2016

PATRICK BENNETT Staff Lampoonist FWIMFest (First Weekend in May) ended on a surprisingly good note with only 300 reported arrests. Half of these arrests were made either inside or outside of the new festival grounds: SEXFest. The first annual SEXFest was created and condoned by the owners of local......

Scallion

Angry cicadas to blame for Ecuadorian earthquake

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016

May 1, 2016

RAVIOLI Staff Lampoonist After learning of a devastating earthquake moving through Ecuador, investigations were carried out in order to determine its epicenter. Geologists were perplexed, however, when they examined the ground beneath them and were blinded by a flock of cicadas emerging from the soil like a resounding......

Scallion

Horoscopes

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016August 15, 2019

May 1, 2016August 15, 2019

PATRICK BENNETT Staff Lampoonist Aries You’re finally going to meet your Tinderfella for a coffee at Upper Crust! Too bad he will literally be a koala bear. You’ve been catfished! Taurus Make a wish upon the stars; you’ll be sloshed and behind bars! Happy birthday, Taurus! ......

Scallion

Countdown to FWIMFest #2: Training

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016September 2, 2019

May 1, 2016September 2, 2019

RILEY STRAW Lampoon Editor The weekend formerly known as FREDFest — and the weekend currently known as FWIMFest — is just around the corner. The question on everyone’s mind: How do I get ready? Throughout the academic year, students have been preparing for this weekend without even knowing it.......

Scallion

‘Game of Thrones’ Spoiler Alert! Virginia Horvath joins the cast

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016

May 1, 2016

MISSY FEOLA Staff Lampoonist The season premiere of “Game of Thrones,” which took place last Sunday, had a special surprise in it. It was kept on the down low for a while now, but the word is finally out now that the episode aired: Virginia Horvath, president of Fredonia,......

Scallion

‘James and the Giant Peach’ confuses local farmers market

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016

May 1, 2016

JESSICA D’NONSENS Lampoonist When a group advertises a very large peach, they better be able to deliver. That was not the case for “James and the Giant Peach,” the Department of Theatre and Dance production that premiered April 22 in Bartlett Theatre. While the performance was unbelievable and received......

Scallion

The sigh heard ‘round the world Clinton wins NY primary thanks to ‘true New Yorkers’

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016September 2, 2019

May 1, 2016September 2, 2019

THE FEVER Assistant Lampoonist To her relief, Hillary Clinton won the New York primary against Bernie Sanders by 8 percent last Tuesday. After being grilled by Sanders’ millennial following and being on a constant losing streak, Clinton pulled through and won New York State. Based on county polls, Clinton’s......

Scallion

Employees hired on basis of good vibes Ban the Box leads to Reject the Resume

Contributor to The LeaderMay 1, 2016

May 1, 2016

RAVIOLI Staff Lampoonist A movement known as “Ban the Box” has recently caught a great deal of attention. Excitement broke out when The SUNY Student Assembly recently voted in favor of the idea. As a result, state officials got the idea to start a movement called “Reject the......

From the Desk of Chloe Kowalyk: Editor in Chief

From the Desk of EJ Jacobs: Life & Arts Editor

From the Desk of Jace Jacobs: Asst. Scallion Editor

From the Desk of Nicole Thorson: Art Director

From the Desk of Henry Domst: Design Editor

From the Desk of Sierra Mills: Chief Copy Editor

[SATIRE] An interview with The Bachelor’s winner, Henry Domst

[OPINION] What COVID-19 inadvertently taught us

ITS unveils stratigic plan for technology

Dr. Kathryn Kendall takes on enrollment

We’re all gonna die, but at least break is longer Summer vacation extended due to global warming

Donald Trump slams The Onion, vomiting, everything else

SEXFest reveals seedy underbelly of Fredonia social scene

Angry cicadas to blame for Ecuadorian earthquake

Horoscopes

Countdown to FWIMFest #2: Training

‘Game of Thrones’ Spoiler Alert! Virginia Horvath joins the cast

‘James and the Giant Peach’ confuses local farmers market

The sigh heard ‘round the world Clinton wins NY primary thanks to ‘true New Yorkers’

Employees hired on basis of good vibes Ban the Box leads to Reject the Resume