The Leader
Scallion

[SATIRE] 03.08.23 Horoscopes

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: < 1 minuteJAY BYRONStaff Scallywag Hello Fredonia! I’m feeling inspired by The Leader’s Managing Editor Chloe Kowalyk’s idea: what pasta type are you? Aries: Linguine. In your heart, you are just a stranger, bigger noodle than most other noodles. Taurus: Bucatini. You try hard to be better than everyone else. Sometimes it......
Scallion

[SATIRE] Local frat boy waaaaay too excited about St. Patrick’s Day

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 2 minutesMATTHEW BAUM Scallion Editor As the various lackluster February holidays have come and gone, the next big event for college students and real people alike is the observance of St. Patrick’s Day.  Devout Christians spend the day observing the life and deeds of the long-passed bishop for which the day......
Scallion

[SATIRE] The REAL Reason Behind Fredonia’s Boil Water Advisory

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 2 minutesOLIVIA SYLVESTER Special to The Leader Last week, every Fredonia student and resident was troubled by a boil water advisory. We couldn’t drink the water, brush our teeth with it or, worst of all, get our favorite Starbucks drink! Now, the people who work in the water treatment facility will......

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