June 14, 2026
Featured

Fredonia announces additional program cuts following finals week

Fredonia has lost the art of the elective

 Orchesis caps off year with ‘Escape Into the Music’

Best photos of the year from Fredonia athletics

Five major takeaways from the 2026 NFL Draft

How To Be a Good White Ally 101

Director of Innovation and Economic Development reportedly retrenched

[SATIRE] Horoscopes

[OPINION] Lovercolumn: Do’s and don’ts of dating

Who started the Butterlow fire? The Leader investigates

The Leader
Scallion

Trump spends $2 billion to nuke China: Republican nominee still polls at 40 percent

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 3 minutes  KEITH MYATH Guest Lampoonist   In his latest string of bizarre antics, news broke late Tuesday night that Donald Trump has shelled out more than $2 billion of his own money to drop a nuclear missile on China. “First of all, it’s pronounced Chee-eye-na,” said Trump in a recent......
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Scallion

In memory of American Decency

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 3 minutesD. ZBORNAK Staff Lampoonist   U.S. citizens across the country are mourning the long-anticipated death of American Decency. While its stamina was sort of up in the air for quite some time, American Decency had undoubtedly experienced an astronomical drop in strength this past year. American historians had initially predicted......
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Scallion

The Lampoon endorses David S. Pumpkins for president

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 2 minutesEMMA PATTERSON Staff Lampoonist   It’s no secret that this presidential election has been, in short, exhausting. Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump have been met with either lukewarm acceptance or alarming reverence from voters, resulting in this being the first election people under the age of 30 have actually cared......
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Scallion

Who wore it better?: A presidential fashion analysis

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 3 minutes  PATRICK BENNETT Staff Lampoonist Whether you’re wearing a fanny pack with mom jeans combo or a camo hoodie with matching camo Crocs, you’re showing people what you’re all about (even though we’d rather not know you if you’re wearing camo Crocs).  This past week, the Lampoon was determined to......
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Scallion

Election Rigging 101: How to rig your local polling station: God knows we need it

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 3 minutesPatrick Bennett Staff Lampoonist In the next couple of weeks, an event will take place that will shape the American people. This isn’t even the announcement that Big Macs will be sold again for $1 on Mondays, it’s the presidential election. The two candidates, Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, are......
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Scallion

The Lampoon’s guide to Spring 2017 courses

Contributor to The Leader
Reading Time: 3 minutes  Kilgore Trout Guest Lampoonist Now that you’ve failed all of your midterm exams, it’s time to think about everyone’s favorite subject: taking more classes. Unless your Powerball numbers finally get called, you’re going to have to endure yet another semester of forgetting about assignments and testing what “excused absence”......
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