The Scallion - Page 75 of 88 - The Leader, SUNY Fredonia's student-run newspaper

Web exclusive: Će JJR to play at Sunny’s for Battle of the New Bands win

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 23, 2015

November 23, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutes PHYLLIS T. CUPP Lampoonist After the cancellation of FREDFest last year, many things have changed. Most notably, fewer propane tanks are flung through LoGrasso windows, fewer students are peeing in water fountains, and Fredonia students participate in less general tomfoolery. Another thing that has changed is the prize......

Scallion

Horoscopes

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 23, 2015August 15, 2019

November 23, 2015August 15, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutes MISSY FEOLA Staff Lampoonist Capricorn Feeling extra salty today? The Starbucks cups got you all riled up? Go find some sugar and sprinkle it all over yourself to counteract your salty ways. Then, put some in your coffee and shut up. Aquarius No one likes to be......

Scallion

Web exclusive Star Wars: The Anti-White Menance

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 23, 2015

November 23, 2015

Reading Time: 3 minutesWHAT THE HECK AM I ABOUT TO READ: In response to the wild accusations that “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” is “anti-white,” here is an argument and a counter argument that show just how insane that claim is. STU PADIDDY Certified Racist White America this week......

Scallion

Authors that ‘Six Characters’ wouldn’t search for

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 18, 2015

November 18, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutesTHE FEVER Assistant Lampoonist With “Six Characters in Search of an Author” coming to a close this past weekend, the Lampoon wondered what kind of author the six characters wouldn’t want. So, a list has been compiled, consisting of writers — including novelists — playwrights and screenwriters, that these......

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Bioengineered water-type Pokémon to replace orcas: Lapras, Gyarados and Blastoise to be featured in new SeaWorld exhibit

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 18, 2015

November 18, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutesPHYLLIS T. CUPP Lampoonist A sigh of relief fell over moral Americans when SeaWorld announced it would be releasing its captive killer whales back into the wild last week. Since the release of the documentary “Blackfish,” SeaWorld has had a difficult time rationalizing the murders of several of its......

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Fallout Fever ‘Fallout 4’ released, players gone missing

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 18, 2015

November 18, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutesTHE FEVER Staff Lampoonist After selling a whopping 12 million copies in just one day, “Fallout 4” has made history, even beating out the highly popular “Grand Theft Auto V.” Along with 12 million copies, there have been 12 million missing persons reports filed worldwide since the game’s release,......

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Inclusive Starbucks cup designs: The Lampoon leaves no religion behind

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 18, 2015August 25, 2019

November 18, 2015August 25, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutes EMMO Staff Lampoonist Starbucks’ decision to drop all Christmas-related symbols from its cup design has a certain kind of customer very unhappy. Enraged by the “politically correct” environment, devout Christians cannot fathom a Starbucks throw-away cup without candy canes, snowflakes, ornaments and all the festive, glittery nonsense that......

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10-hour wait at Tim Hortons Line spans from Williams Center to Fenton Hall

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 10, 2015

November 10, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutesMISSY FEOLA Staff Lampoonist Fredonia is only a few people away from making it into the Guinness Book of World Records for having the longest line ever at a Tim Hortons. At 2 p.m. on Nov. 8, it was recorded that the line for the on-campus Tim Hortons had......

Scallion

Bethesda to release ‘explosive’ DLC The real-life ‘Fallout 4’ experience

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 10, 2015August 25, 2019

November 10, 2015August 25, 2019

Reading Time: 2 minutesTHE FEVER Staff Lampoonist War never changes. Not even with the release of a new video game. With “Fallout 4” officially released yesterday, it only seemed appropriate to celebrate in Fallout fashion — with nuclear strikes. In a surprise press conference, Todd Howard, Bethesda Game Studios game director and......

Scallion

Trick-or-treating brings ecstasy Halloween candy laced with drugs

Contributor to The LeaderNovember 10, 2015

November 10, 2015

Reading Time: 2 minutesCHARLES PRITCHARD Staff Writer Halloween has come and gone, and there’s only one question on everyone’s lips: how much ecstasy did kids really end up with in their goody bags? A number of candies, which look like everything from smarties to knock-off gummy bears, have been popping up lately,......

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Web exclusive: Će JJR to play at Sunny’s for Battle of the New Bands win

Horoscopes

Web exclusive Star Wars: The Anti-White Menance

Authors that ‘Six Characters’ wouldn’t search for

Bioengineered water-type Pokémon to replace orcas: Lapras, Gyarados and Blastoise to be featured in new SeaWorld exhibit

Fallout Fever ‘Fallout 4’ released, players gone missing

Inclusive Starbucks cup designs: The Lampoon leaves no religion behind

10-hour wait at Tim Hortons Line spans from Williams Center to Fenton Hall

Bethesda to release ‘explosive’ DLC The real-life ‘Fallout 4’ experience

Trick-or-treating brings ecstasy Halloween candy laced with drugs